This blog contains my first works as I re-find my way back to art. Some materials are signed with my nickname "Liloth", with which my family and closest friends call me.
In my youth, doing art for schools and working on cartoon characters (we don't call it anime yet during that time) brought me joy and popularity among my classmates and in our highschool homesite. However, when I started working, I lost the interest to pursue it and after seventeen years working as an HR expert, I reached my saturation point and was so stressed. As a result, I left my regular job in a prestigious company.
In 2012, I began another job, which brought me to several places. The airport and hotel became my second home. Being alone during work gigs, I returned to sketching. I stopped drawing in 2005 and the photo below was my last drawing during that year:
The signature I used here was actually what I used for office reports.
I haven't developed my artist's signature yet.
If you will notice from the drawing, the little girl drawing on the sand is not the exact likeness of the photo. The photograph was taken by my father and the little girl on it was me. When I drew this, I was so optimistic about the future, and I was too eager to make a mark. Maybe that's why the back of the little girl on my sketch was high and straight instead of crouching down. Being a graduate of psychology, I was taught to interpret drawings (i.e. Draw a Person Test and HTP - House-Tree-Person Test) or we call it projective tests. I looked hard on my drawing, I can see that I was innocent and the sea is bright and flowing. There's much emphasis on the drawing on the sand. However, in projective exams, drawing a person showing his/her back is indicative of withdrawal. I looked back and I think it is somehow true. During that time, I refused to accept my limitations as my parents were so fearful, not wanting me to work faraway from them. They were not able to stop me.
Moving forward to 2012, after gaining so much experience with society, I started sketching. To be exact, it was in October 2012. We were in Cebu during a Team's Meeting with consultancy and our technical advisor, Mr. Jean Caron brought us to Bluewaters Beach Resort. There was nothing much to do because I cannot join them swim. I took a rest in my room and found a drawing pad, which was materials for the activity. I started sketching and produced this, which I called "The Tamer". It was during this time that I was delighted to learn that I never lost the skill in drawing.
The Tamer
Lead pencil on paper
2012
I asked myself what motivated me to draw this. The model was Jose Rizal and the dog was Bantay, a nursery book character. During that time, I was learning to subdue my aggressive tendencies. I was trying my best to find joy with my work and learning to subdue my "wants" for material needs. My job pay during that time was twice lower than what I'm used to receiving. The advantage of working for the cooperative was that the workplace was near our home and that I get to attend training, education, and travel far while earning. Maybe that's why I entitled this "The Tamer", a lead pencil drawing on an 8.5 X 12 inches pad.
Look at the drawing and take note of the man's stance. The hands hidden on pockets denote secrecy, while the wide stance of his legs is indicative of gaining solid ground or stability. Since I was new in the cooperative sector during that time, I was finding my bearing and solidifying my career by learning and gaining a complete understanding of the co-op sector. Now that I am looking at it closely, I get to understand more how my emotions adapted to the situation.
By drawing, I get to communicate with my inner self. I get to express my thoughts unconsciously and I get to record my state at a specific period in time. We can say that art can be historical. And it expresses well the person's thoughts, feelings, and mental state.
It was fascinating to look back at what I have drawn earlier. For instance, this watercolor painting, which I called Vision of Heaven, is actually my desire to see happiness in the future. Looking at the folded skin of the eye owner, you'll know that the person aged well. When we reach that age, we come closer to seeing what the afterlife would look like. We hope for heaven and peace.
Vision of Heaven
Art by Rose Gob, Signed with Liloth
2012
This was drawn without reference. Also, I signed this with my nickname that only my close friends and family know of. Although it is just a simple drawing done on illustration board, this has somehow had much value for me. I've kept it for a very long time and still cannot part with it. Because this very piece denotes my strong positivity towards the future.
The next paintings demonstrate how I developed my oil painting on canvas board. I call this piece "The Rage". When I first painted it, the ship was so calf and nice. I usually like the color of blue and the ship is a reflection of my travels in life. When I say travel, I actually refer to my life's journey. Then I met an artist who was a previous prisoner. He taught me how to add character to my works. He said I need to express my angst and just loosely let me work with the palette and paints. He asked me to throw the paint and let my anger out. Initially, I cannot comprehend what he wanted me to do. Because I've never been so angry in my life. I was thought by our ministers to get angry but not let the sun goes down with that anger. Working on this piece presented so much challenge for me. And when I finished it, I kept on working on it until I bartered it with a more peaceful work by a fellow artist. It's the only work that really exhibited my fears and disturbance. The work was timely as well because it was created after the Yolanda storm wreaked havoc in our country. I hope its owner appreciates it.
The Rage at its final form
2013
Painting and art also serve as a venue for releasing your anger. You may not be able to punch someone or destroy ceramic plates, but by throwing paints and creating an image has turned something negative and ugly, into something arresting or mesmerizing. When you look at this painting, what do you fee? For me, whenever I look at it, what I see is the light despite the raging water. The water is symbolical too. In the scriptures, Jesus Christ is represented by water. With the raging water, I thought, I fear God's wrath for not being able to follow well His teachings. I can stay afloat because I believe that God takes pity on me and helps me.
The next piece is an image of a friend whom I took her photo during one of our travels. I translated it into a painting because her stance was very hopeful. With a
hope that remains in us, we will keep on living and striving to give our best. After having this painted, I gave it to Sharon as a gift... thus, I call this piece "The Gift". It is an acrylic and oil painting on canvas panel.
"The Gift"
Art by Rose Gob (signed with Liloth)
Sept. 2012
We all received the gift of life. Hope and faith keep us alive... "Love" makes us strong and leads us to inner peace and happiness. Let us not waste our gift by giving up due to depression.
Finally, life is God's breath among us and things around us. I love this last art piece, which I called "The Flow", acrylic on canvas. It showed my energy level and passion. It displays hope, faith, and love as symbolized by the water, light, birds, and bamboos, which symbolizes people's resilience. I pray that viewers of this piece would gain strength and positive energy.
The Flow
February 2019
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